QOTDs:
Kelsey: Hy-Vee's like a cheap whore, it'll give anyone a job.

Becca: I cheeked him.

"A PHONE."

Thomas: Q. O. T. fucking. D.

Thomas (the day after we see Boondock Saints): Heh. You thought it was about hillbillies.
Me: You know, ordinarily I'd be upset over you being right, but it was so good I don't even care.