Real_QOTDs:
"So, I went to the movies tonight and ended up under some hot asian chicks." Just to clarify, I did not say that.

"Batman Begins. Fred Stops."

Parents: So, what do you do for a living?
The_Boyfriend: I'm a batsuit consultant... yep...

"Well, I'm not the one who tatooed myself with a very hot spork..."

"And if I said no? ...well, you'd probably catch a plane back and kick my ass, because that'd be your reaction."

"So he rushed the pontiff-- DAMNIT! THE PLAINTIFF! Yeah, that's right, His Holiness himself was there..."

Thomas: It's empty.
Me: So's mine.
Note: imagine spoken, with sunglasses worn in the dark, in the most badass way imaginable and you have the patheticness that is us.